Ok, it’s official. The universe is taunting me. See, the past few months I’ve been seeing babies everywhere—at the mall, in my neighborhood, even in church, of all places! Not just babies, a whole lot of bald babies! Sooo cute!
To make matters desperate, I saw this super cute toddler at the mall who was probably a child actor cuz when he saw me through the store display window, he stared and stared, all the while laughing and showing his gums, which barely had any teeth! And then he started waving. Sooo cute! Had there been fewer people at the mall, I’d probably have run off with that precocious little tyke! Seriously!
After partly exhausting the baby subject last night with my cuz, I woke up and turned on the TV to entertain me while I did my stretching exercises. Guess what Charito Solis’ first line was… go on, guess. “Buntis ako.” Wahahaha. See why I’m getting the feeling that I’m being taunted? Tsk tsk tsk.
The funny thing is, the only thing I’ve been praying for every night since Thursday after my first ever “happy tears” (thanks Jaze) was… no, not babies. Hehe. I’ve been praying for direction. More specifically, signs. You know, kinda like stop, turn left, turn right, make a u-turn here, you get the drift.
I simply wanted to know what I should do next. Like study the piano or the guitar (cuz I’d like to learn how to play an instrument so that I can write a song for Mimi. Hahaha). Or whether I should buy a bike or enroll in a gym. Or if I should study Engineering or International Law (both subjects have always fascinated me). Or if I should move to New York, Italy or Australia within the next 10 years.
Mostly though, I just need His help in making the most confusing decision of all—how to make a difference in this cruel world. Cheesy, I know. But that has always been an integral part of my character so it’s kinda hard to turn my back on it.
By the way, the movie is still going on in the background while I’m writing this and at this point, Charito has already given birth to two baby girls. Ok. By refusing to turn off the TV I’m mocking myself.
I don’t know what the reasons are for this return of the wannababy craze. Might be the biological clock sounding off alarm bells, could be raging hormones, might be cuz March is women’s month, I even thought it was menopause! Seriously! I know. I’m weird. Hahaha. I even looked up menopause and stumbled across another link about women that said we reach our most hormonal phase during our early 20’s and again between the ages of 30 and 40. Oh puhleez!
Hmmm… Last time this happened was just after college. Well, I’ll stop there lest I end up putting my foot further in my mouth than I already have. Hihihi.
Guess this phase is normal. Hope I get through it without falling into any pits; though if it’s Brad Pitt, I probably wouldn’t mind… jumping into a pit with him. Hihihi. Sorry, couldn’t help myself.
I know this probably isn’t making much sense but one thing is clear—the wannababy dry spell is over. For almost 10 years I’ve sworn off even entertaining the possibility. The thought of giving birth still sounds super scary but all my friends who are now mothers share a common opinion. All the pain in the world is nothing compared to the joy of holding your newborn baby in your arms. Ok, I get the point.
Hey, even the real M.C. (the diva) is talking about having a baby so can you blame me? She said the only thing she’s concerned about is she might not be ready yet since having a baby is a lifetime responsibility. She makes one fine point.
One thing strikes me as funny—the same logic applies to having babies and being a separada. My friends and I were talking about it and one of them pointed out that in order to be separated, you need a partner first, and married men are out of the equation. Same goes for babies, right? Hahaha.
Seriously though, this is not a personal ad [Wanted: baby daddy]. That’s why I didn’t use “I wanna have your baby” as my title. Too bad, would’ve been really catchy though. Too misleading. Hihihi. I’m just making sense of the traffic signs that I’m encountering along the way. Wouldn’t wanna make a wrong turn and wind up in a ditch somewhere [or end up getting ditched].
Shortcuts are out of the question so this is bound to be one very complicated ride. Think I might need that cute red bike with red tassels and bell to help me navigate this road. One thing’s for sure, I’ve got all the Light that I need to help me through this journey.
So that’s my journal for the day. Was giggling during some parts so I’m glad I wrote this. What a great way to start the day. Hope Lola doesn’t think I’ve gone bonkers or something though. :P
Sigh, gotta steel myself for the invasion of the bald babies in church this afternoon. It’s become a staple already no matter what time I go there. So guess I’ll have to face the wannababy music once more and hope that I resist the urge to take one home with me. Hahaha. Mothers beware, babynapper on the loose! Have a blessed Sunday, everyone!
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